The Memoir Land Author Questionnaire #82: Katya Cengel
"There are two distinct voices in the book, that of me as a 9-year-old who decides on a self-destructive path, and me as an adult investigating the treatment I received and the reasoning behind it."
Since 2010, in various publications, I’ve interviewed authors—mostly memoirists—about aspects of writing and publishing. Initially I did this for my own edification, as someone who was struggling to find the courage and support to write and publish my memoir. I’m still curious about other authors’ experiences, and I know many of you are, too. So, inspired by the popularity of The Oldster Magazine Questionnaire, I’ve launched The Memoir Land Author Questionnaire.
Here’s the 82nd installment, featuring , author most recently of Straitjackets and Lunch Money. -Sari Botton
Katya Cengel is the author of two memoirs, From Chernobyl with Love and Straitjackets and Lunch Money. From Chernobyl with Love covers her time reporting in Ukraine earlier this century while Straitjackets and Lunch Money chronicles her time in a psychosomatic ward as a 10-year-old. Cengel also writes about Bosnian Bruce Lee statues, Mongolian bands and searching for big foot in Utah – she didn’t find him. Her features, essays and short stories have been published in the New York Times Magazine, Smithsonian Magazine and Atavist among others. Her memoirs have received Independent Publisher Book Awards and an Eric Hoffer Academic Press award. When not writing, Cengel teaches writing (Journalism) at California Polytechnic State University, San Luis Obispo. Find her on Instagram.
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How old are you, and for how long have you been writing?
I am 48 and I have been “writing” since before I could actually write. As a small child I used to dictate poems to anyone I could talk into transcribing them—they were pretty bad. After I learned to write I got into short stories. In high school The House on Mango Street inspired me to try vignettes. It was in college that I really found my voice; that is when I began writing memoir and also working in journalism.
What’s the title of your latest book, and when was it published?
Straitjackets and Lunch Money was released in September 2023. My first memoir, From Chernobyl with Love, came out in paperback in May 2023.
What number book is this for you?
Straitjackets and Lunch Money is my fourth book. Earlier books were about minor league baseball (Bluegrass Baseball: A Year in the Minor League Life) and the deportation of Cambodian Americans (Exiled: From the Killing Fields of Cambodia to California and Back). I don’t really have a specialization other than human interest stories.
How do you categorize your book—as a memoir, memoir-in-essays, essay collection, creative nonfiction, graphic memoir, autofiction—and why?
I consider Straitjackets and Lunch Money a memoir. To me a memoir means using an individual story as a way into a larger story. In Straitjackets and Lunch Money the larger story is the treatment of mentally ill children. I use my own memories of being in a psychosomatic ward as a young child to examine the history of treating children with mental illness. There are two distinct voices in the book, that of me as a 9-year-old who decides on a self-destructive path, and me as an adult investigating the treatment I received and the reasoning behind it.
Straitjackets and Lunch Money offers two unique perspectives, that of a young child institutionalized in a psychosomatic unit and that of a journalist investigating the treatment the child received years later. I am both the child and the journalist.
What is the “elevator pitch” for your book?
Straitjackets and Lunch Money offers two unique perspectives, that of a young child institutionalized in a psychosomatic unit and that of a journalist investigating the treatment the child received years later. I am both the child and the journalist. In 1986 at age 10 I became patient number 090 71 51 at Stanford Children’s Hospital. I spent more than 100 days in a unit that included non-compliant diabetic boys, bulimic girls, and a number of other mostly teenage patients who had both mental and physical ailments. I always felt the world wanted to hide us away so after I became a journalist, I set out to document my experience and investigate the treatment children like me received then and now.
What’s the back story of this book including your origin story as a writer? How did you become a writer, and how did this book come to be?
In many ways Straitjackets and Lunch Money defines my experience as a writer. Although Straitjackets and Lunch Money is my fourth book I began writing it before my first book. I was in college and not that far removed from my childhood memories of the hospital when I began writing the original portions of Straitjackets about my hospital stay. I was angry and the words were raw. My professor told me I had a strong voice and that I had something to say. I used my writing as a way to force people to see a set of people, in this case mentally ill children, I felt society wanted to ignore.
At the same time, I was starting to work in journalism and this attitude of writing about forgotten people, for lack of a better term, is what I used as a reporter. Some early stories included writing about college egg donors, the women left behind when Soviet troops pulled out of Estonia and survivors of the Chernobyl disaster. For this book the investigative techniques I developed as a journalist coupled with the distance of years helped me to add the context of how my story fits into the larger story.
What were the hardest aspects of writing this book and getting it published?
The hardest part for me was reliving my time in the hospital. Some of the things I experienced, like being put in a straightjacket, were so traumatic I had buried them deep in my memory. Bringing all of that to the surface took a toll and I slipped back into depression. Another challenging aspect was tracking down the doctors, therapists and other medical personal who treated me. I did not have good memories of my interactions with most of these people and I was scared of some of them. I was 10 and powerless the last time I had seen them. The doctor who decided my treatment plan had been like a god in my world.
Publishing was also a challenge. I had an agent but it took a little while to find a good home for Straitjackets and Lunch Money at Woodhall Press. While rejection is never easy, having this book rejected was harder than usual because it was like having my ten year old self ignored all over again.
How did you handle writing about real people in your life? Did you use real or changed names and identifying details? Did you run passages or the whole book by people who appear in the narrative? Did you make changes they requested?
Because many of the people in the book are children, I felt it was important to change their names. For the adults I used their real names, expect for one medical professional who did not agree to speak with me.
My publisher asked me to have the medical professionals sign interview release forms and that was incredibly stressful. As a journalist I feel strongly about not showing my writing to my sources prior to publication lest they have undue influence on it. In this case I briefly described over the phone or in email the essence of what I had included from them. In one case when a lawyer became involved, I agreed to share my taped recordings of our interviews but not my notes or the writing itself.
In 1986 at age 10 I became patient number 090 71 51 at Stanford Children’s Hospital. I spent more than 100 days in a unit that included non-compliant diabetic boys, bulimic girls, and a number of other mostly teenage patients who had both mental and physical ailments. I always felt the world wanted to hide us away so after I became a journalist, I set out to document my experience and investigate the treatment children like me received then and now.
Who is another writer you took inspiration from in producing this book? Was it a specific book, or their whole body of work? (Can be more than one writer or book.)
In some ways I think everything I have ever read up to the point I wrote Straitjackets informed my writing of it. Because Straitjackets is the second memoir I have written, the memoirs I read while writing my first memoir served as early inspiration even though the subject matter is completely different. The honesty and humor of Jennifer Steil’s The Woman Who Fell From the Sky comes to mind as does Karol Nielsen’s Black Elephants. For the child’s voice I was influenced by a fiction book, Hideous Kinky, by Esther Freud. Content-wise Rachel Aviv’s Strangers to Ourselves and Susanne O’Sullivan’s The Sleeping Beauties proved informative. Both O’Sullivan and Aviv take an investigative look at mystery illnesses of the mind and body so those definitely helped with my writing in the adult voice.
What advice would you give to aspiring writers looking to publish a book like yours, who are maybe afraid, or intimidated by the process?
I like to keep it simple. For many writers the hardest part is starting so I would advise them not to over think it and just sit down and write whatever comes out. Once they have gotten going a bit then they can reflect, but the words need to come first.
What do you love about writing?
The way I can escape into another world. When I am really caught up in crafting a story, whether it be fiction or non-fiction, it is a bit like an out of body experience. I am immersed in the world on the page and no longer seated at my desk. Daily life ceases to matter, I am entirely focused on whatever world I am writing about, whether it is my own or someone else’s.
What frustrates you about writing?
So much. For me getting into a story can be challenging. I become frustrated when I can’t lose myself in my words. Starting a new story, article, essay, whatever it is, is what I dread most. At the same time I also am not very patient with edits. When I am done with a story I am done with it and ready to move on.
What about writing surprises you?
How it turns out. I have an idea of what I am going to write going in but how the story ends up is often a surprise even to me. The story takes on a life of its own, especially if it is fiction and there are characters, they end up doing things I never expected them to do. Real people also tend to surprise me in ways I never imagined. That is the fun of it, never knowing how things are going to end up.
Does your writing practice involve any kind of routine or writing at specific times?
I prefer writing in the morning before I have checked email or looked at my phone. Weekends are also a good time to avoid distractions. I leave interviews, editing and less creative elements of the craft for later in the day when life’s distractions are harder to avoid.
The hardest part for me was reliving my time in the hospital. Some of the things I experienced, like being put in a straightjacket, were so traumatic I had buried them deep in my memory. Bringing all of that to the surface took a toll and I slipped back into depression. Another challenging aspect was tracking down the doctors, therapists and other medical personal who treated me. I did not have good memories of my interactions with most of these people and I was scared of some of them.
Do you engage in any other creative pursuits, professionally or for fun? Are there non-writing activities do you consider to be “writing” or supportive of your process?
I like to run, swim and hike, all things that allow my mind to wander. I sometimes start thinking about something I am writing; other times my mind just makes things up to entertain me. I rarely listen to anything while doing these activities so my mind is forced to amuse me. I end up traveling long distances for work. I find travel in general tends to help with creativity because it removes me from my world. I am not sure if it will inspire creativity but I recently started learning to fence.
What’s next for you? Do you have another book planned, or in the works?
Right now, I am returning to where I started and working on short stories as well as essays. You can find my short story “A Palm Tree in Bosnia” in the latest issue (95) of The Louisville Review.
Dear Katya: I am utterly intrigued by your premise and structure of Strait Jackets as a conversation between a younger and older self, which is what every memoir is. I am certain it cost you emotionally to go back there, as you said; consider the price you paid your gift to the world. "I write from pain," says Truman Capote. Me too.
Really poignant, the experience of having your young self “rejected” when the manuscript was rejected. Thank you for sharing that here.