Thank you for sharing this part of you! You know, my mom told me a long time ago that relationships are like gifts, you're either the one who's giving or the one who's receiving. Both places are important, though and meant to teach us about ourselves.
YES I remember this same phenomenon in Seattle in the wake of 911, and I'm sure it was everywhere. Great details and insights, and deeply relatable. Thanks for reminding us that you're NOT JUST a great editor, but an excellent writer as well :)
What a great story, I was fully immersed. I can relate to being hopeless at having a fling. Sadly, if someone told me they weren't into music my vagina would instantly shrivel up and fall out.
Oh I loved this and related to almost every single word, as you basically summed up my entire dating life of my 20s and 30s. Thank you for making me feel less alone and less ashamed of not being able to have flings!
This was such a sweet memory of a sweet man who with his dog was sweet kind and unsuitable athletic. It brought tears to my eyes. I hope Zach found lasting love like you did.
What a beautiful essay, in a sense about how some of us aren't cut out to be casual with our bodies and affections: "Flings are fine for other people, but I’m pretty sure they’re not for me." I do totally get the arms wrapped tightly around you, a kind of oxytocin dose that provided solace during the post 9-11 horror days, along with the pain of a previous break up. I'm so glad you split with Zach and then met Brian - who makes music with you!
I also thought after I wrote that and checked out for the evening that it does not seem appropriate to me that a therapist "prescribed" or suggested flings. And then when you "flung" told you, later, that the warning signs were written all over Zach. Wouldn't a perceptive and helpful therapist, perhaps a woman, understand that some of us don't thrive on giving our bodies (and hearts) away? I'm not writing this in judgement, as you don't seem to either. But I need to say it. And I've had many therapists, whenever insurance covered them, and heard plenty of unhelpful stuff! So I get that you listened.
Beautiful narrative! You have captured the human insecurity and vulnerability so well! Thank you for sharing!
❤️
Zach didn't like music. Heh. So glad you met Brian!
Thank you for sharing this part of you! You know, my mom told me a long time ago that relationships are like gifts, you're either the one who's giving or the one who's receiving. Both places are important, though and meant to teach us about ourselves.
YES I remember this same phenomenon in Seattle in the wake of 911, and I'm sure it was everywhere. Great details and insights, and deeply relatable. Thanks for reminding us that you're NOT JUST a great editor, but an excellent writer as well :)
❤️
What a great story, I was fully immersed. I can relate to being hopeless at having a fling. Sadly, if someone told me they weren't into music my vagina would instantly shrivel up and fall out.
Ha ha. That last line made me laugh out loud.
Oh I loved this and related to almost every single word, as you basically summed up my entire dating life of my 20s and 30s. Thank you for making me feel less alone and less ashamed of not being able to have flings!
So glad to know this resonated!
What a joyful read. Not a music lover was the absolute dealbreaker. As another constitutionally monogamous person, I love this story.
Thanks, Laura.
Thank you for sharing! There must be a 'fling' gene - I don't have it either 🤷
Brilliant essay! Loved it! Thank you for sharing!
To the Zachs in our lives! Wonderful piece, Sari!
Thanks, Mukta!
This was such a sweet memory of a sweet man who with his dog was sweet kind and unsuitable athletic. It brought tears to my eyes. I hope Zach found lasting love like you did.
I'm with you. Flings are awful. You capture the mindset and feelings of the committed monogamist just perfectly. Beautiful piece.
Thank you!
Zach didn’t seem built to fling easily either - perhaps the primary thing you had in common?
Interesting theory! Yes, I think Zach was also a serial monogamist.
What a beautiful essay, in a sense about how some of us aren't cut out to be casual with our bodies and affections: "Flings are fine for other people, but I’m pretty sure they’re not for me." I do totally get the arms wrapped tightly around you, a kind of oxytocin dose that provided solace during the post 9-11 horror days, along with the pain of a previous break up. I'm so glad you split with Zach and then met Brian - who makes music with you!
Thanks, Kirie. 💕
I also thought after I wrote that and checked out for the evening that it does not seem appropriate to me that a therapist "prescribed" or suggested flings. And then when you "flung" told you, later, that the warning signs were written all over Zach. Wouldn't a perceptive and helpful therapist, perhaps a woman, understand that some of us don't thrive on giving our bodies (and hearts) away? I'm not writing this in judgement, as you don't seem to either. But I need to say it. And I've had many therapists, whenever insurance covered them, and heard plenty of unhelpful stuff! So I get that you listened.
Wonderful piece!
This is beautiful and so relatable. I will definitely buy Confessions…