21 Comments

"scrubbing the stovetop as if it owed her money" brilliant

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How often, and dangerously, sex is spammed with guilt and denial. As if it weren't the thing that makes the world go 'round! If we could face sex head on, and acknowledge the drive as we do those other hungers--for food, companionship, shelter--perhaps it could be treated as just another life skill to acquire, and be taught along with math and nutrition in high school.

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Taught perhaps better than it is currently taught in school.

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Today shame and denial are baked into the instruction, in many places. And who needs that? When my kids were young teenagers they took a course called Our Whole Lives, which was taught in the Sunday school at our Unitarian Church. It was terrific. They brought in the full rainbow of individuals to address the class, and it turned both of our sons into advocates and allies for all kinds of people who love in all kinds of ways. It was genius. https://www.uua.org/re/owl

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Thank you for sharing this part of your story. I particularly loved the use of the word ‘ramble’ in the second paragraph, it stopped me in my tracks and added a wry touch of humor.

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I wondered if the editor would take that word out, but perhaps she (Sari Botton) saw the humor in it also.

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I am glad you are past the point of punishing yourself. Sending love and thank you for sharing, Marnie

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You are exactly my age and so many moments of this deeply touched me. Your writing is powerful and so evocative of our era. Thank you for sharing your important story. 🙏🏼

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Very compelling, taking the reader right in with you. Thank you for sharing your courage and acceptance of self. 🙏😊

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That took courage Ramona. Thank you for it. It’s not for sissies is it? The pursuit of our dreams.

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It's up there with growing older, not for sissies.

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Who knew?🤷🏽

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Thank you. When will be learn to really talk to our daughters? It's the secrets that kill us. You may have saved someone just by telling this story.

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I just got a note from someone else about my piece in the Sullivan County Democrat entitled "The Magic Words" that it also saved them. Love hearing that! Thank you.

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So vividly told. And the legacy… I'm so sorry to read about the cancer, Ramona.

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Raw and real. Thanks for sharing your story. Hope you're doing okay. Cancer sucks and treatment is hard! Sending you lots of love and hugs.

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What a powerful piece, Ramona. As a single woman halfway across the world in the 2020s, I related so much with some of the anxieties you talked about. Sending you more power and hoping to read more of you 🙏🏾

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“Past feeling jealous of others who perhaps did worse than me, and have gotten off scott free.”

Two words: Keith Richards.

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Funny you would mention Keith as I worked with him when he was at the height of his junkie business, and I was an audio engineer in NYC throughout the late 70s and into the 80s. I was told Keith had the money to get his entire blood changed every few years. Don't know if that's true but I suppose, if so, that might have been what keeps him going. It is no fair, right?

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Might be worth a try. Did you ever hear what species the blood came from?

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Species? Yes, it was supposedly human blood, I believe done in Switzerland or Sweden. And very expensive. Certainly beyond my means if that's what you are suggesting.

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